CAPITAL MANES: Part 2 - My experience as a special guest at game 4

by Radek Bonk's Mullet

Unlike Cory Conacher and Guillaume Latendresse, I was lucky enough to be in attentance for game 4 in Ottawa. Thanks to the success of the Sens Money on the Board campaign, I was invited by the Sens Foundation as a special guest to the game.

Here's part 1 of my journey, which goes up until I left for the game.

Not included in my last post was my interview with CBC. Apparently it was a slow news day. Read up on the rest of adventures after the break.

"Live" blog (continued): Click the images to enlarge

5:00 PM: We've embarked on the scenic journey to Kanata. I truly missed the view.

Picturesque landscape

5:30 PM: 20,500 near bumper to bumper collisions later, we've reached the Bank. Apparently we're important enough to require valet parking. I was disappointed to see they were supporting the Penguins in that they were all wearing tuxedos.

Working as hard as the Senators in game 4

5:40 PM: One could say being a mullet has its perks.

Honestly I just wanted a picture with the pom poms.

5:45 PM: I was fortunate enough to meet Stuntman Stu. I have to say he's one of the most charismatic people I've met in my life. I hope that some day I can meet the real Stu. He must be great.

He didn't even perform any stunts. Disappointed.

6:00 PM: We got wined and dined by the Sens Foundation. Apparently I've been doing Sens games wrong.

A chef aiding with my tradition of pre-game carbo-loading.

6:20 PM: I was whisked away from the table to do an interview with CTV. My interview was cut short in their news program, much like the mistake Radek made with his hair in the late 90's.

6:30 PM: Headed back inside. Unfortunately they had stopped serving dinner and were only offering items from the Kyle Turris menu.

Each cake was individually pre-screened by Turris himself. #BigBootyPoppin

7:20 PM: Headed to our seats. We sat with Brad from the Sens Foundation. This is Brad. He's a big nerd.

Brad aka @SensFoundation

7:29 PM: My sister brings a new meaning to redhead.

The joke is that the lighting makes her entire head look red, including her face.

7:30 PM: Incredible.

I suggest clicking the image to enlarge it.

7:35 PM: Lyndon Slewidge making sweet, sensual love with my ear drums.

Nice to see they let Conacher hold a flag.

7:36 PM: I wasn't aware I had "obstructed view" tickets.

Probably one of the biggest flags I've ever had draped over my body. Top 5 at least.

7:37 PM: For some reason Lyndon's mic cut out during the end of the anthem, so CBC cut to me, his backup singer. Unfortunately the rest of the crowd sang completely over top of me.

Simulated image of Bonk's Mullet in your living room. Poor sad Brad.

First period summary: Craig Anderson.

First intermission: I got a shout out from Stuntman Stu. This wasn't quite what I had in mind when I envisioned my name in lights some day.

I was a dick and missed the very next slide, which was wishing my sister a happy birthday.

First intermission continued: Kevin had been on a quest to obtain the legendary Bonk's Mullet autograph. Fans around us looked on, excited that I might be someone famous. How disappointing for them.

Second period: The Penguins scored a lot, allowing these guys to express their enthusiasm for Windows 8.

Windows 8: Hop on the bandwagon

This was the best display of teamwork and coordination in the Penguins' zone all period.

Note Erik Karlsson taking a break in the crowd

Second intermission: I met a bunch of lovely people. We shared a moment bonding over appreciation of this guy's awesome mullet.

Sorry, whoever you are.

Third period: RISE UP! RISE UP!

Making fun of that Spartan intro will never not be funny.

I'm getting tired of watching this guy play.

I'm 2 for 2 in getting Anderson pulled.

This was the crowd with 3 minutes to play. It would be concerning, but the fact that most of the crowd made it up until this point was already a miracle.

The newest party game: Ottawa or Phoenix?

At least the crowd that was left gave them a standing ovation. I was too stupid to understand why. I hadn't considered the possibility that Ottawa wasn't winning the next 3.

Those rays of light are the heavens opening up for Alfie's return

I didn't even realize at the time that it might be ~~this man's~~ God's last game in Ottawa. I'm going to choose to accept reality and assume it wasn't

The shame is evident in their body language

Post game: A lot of anger was sent my way on Twitter last night for wearing pants. I was fully prepared to slip off the slacks. I even had it pre-approved by security. But sometimes, the moment isn't right to take your pants off.

When asked after the game if I thought Rihannaing would have made a difference, I responded, "Probably not. With my full bladder and the draft in the arena right now...it doesn't look too good." Does this mean I lack leadership? I don't think so. I took the brunt of the Twitter attention away from the Senators and placed it squarely on myself, like a true leader.

I did learn a lesson though. Never wear this secret bad luck charm ever again.